The Return of Undies4Life

4-December 2021: The Return of Undies4Life

I am back from the "under"world. To say that 2021 has sucked would be an understatement. Most likely, I am not alone in that regard. Some of you may have had it worse than I have, perhaps losing a loved one. COVID-19 and the political climate seem to want to destroy life as we know it.

Personally, I became ill with Coronavirus in late November 2020, one month before the vaccine became available to me. The illness was moderate. Although it may be all in my head, I'm not sure I've been back to "normal" since. My stamina and exercise capacity are reduced. I'm short of breath and note that my heart races when I climb steps. I've been unable (and unmotivated) to return to my running routine. I have tried to run. It's as though I have lost my passion or desire to get back to an exercise regimen. Additionally, I have this constant ringing in my ears (tinnitus); it's been present so long that I'm doubtful it will ever cease.

I was fortunate to get vaccinated for COVID just before Christmas 2020. Then the whole political insurrection occurred in Washington, DC, on January 6, 2021. I thought the uprising would quiet all Trump supporters, but it hasn't. If anything, our country is more divided now than ever. COVID-19 should not be political, yet it somehow is.

During this time, I gained weight and now dislike immensely what I see in the mirror. My weight is the heaviest it has ever been in my entire life. My joy for underwear has diminished greatly. My underwear collection is vast, and most of the pairs (size small) no longer fit very well on my larger frame. I also deactivated this blog, Instagram, Tumblr, and Twitter. The time away was a much-needed respite.

Honestly, I questioned what the point of everything is?!

Most of you may be unaware that suicide rates among healthcare workers are on the rise. I have better insight now regarding this. Moral injury abounds. Conversations with patients are maddening and proceed like this:
Dr: I recommend that you get the COVID vaccine.
Patient: Ummm...I'm not going to.
Dr: Okay. Let me know if you reconsider, and I will help you with that.
Patient: But if I get sick, I want you to do everything possible to keep me alive though--Ivermectin, hydroxychloroquine, monoclonal antibodies, ventilator therapy. You name it, do it! I'm just not taking "the jab."

How is it any different from this?:
Dr: I recommend you walk on the sidewalk instead of the middle of the street for your safety.
Patient: No thanks. The sidewalk is too crowded. I need my personal space.
Dr: Okay. Just be careful.
Patient: If I get flattened by a truck, I want you to put all my pieces back together exactly the way they were before. That's my right, ya know. Make sure you do it right.

You see. We have to make everything much harder than it should be.

When I need to transfer a patient from our rural hospital to Minneapolis or Sioux Falls or anywhere in the Tri-State area, it's frustrating exercise. There are no beds anywhere. And unless it affects people directly, they just don't seem to care about others. It is all about their "medical freedom" and their ability to not get vaccinated or not wear a mask.

To be clear, I am not suicidal and never was. But I don't really care at this point whether I live or die. I've raised my kids to an age of maturity where I know they will be okay. My wife will be financially sound. I have had a good life. If I die tomorrow, I will not have regrets.

The only thing I want to accomplish before I die is to get rid of some of "my baggage" so that my family will not discover my secrets and be harmed in the process. That's it! Then I can die in peace.

I kept in contact with one of my underwear buddies from Tumblr during my solitude. We were chatting about Black Friday sales. While I hadn't made any recent purchases, he nudged me on. So I splurged and bought some new undies after a longggggg break. Hey, I needed some new sizes anyway. I took advantage of the sales from Todd Sanfield, 2Xist, Cin2, and International Jock.

Here is the Todd Sanfield Defiant Sport Brief I purchased...

I love the cut of this brief and the color/print. 

I'm still unsure if my love of undies is back at the pre-pandemic level. Will it ever be? Only time will tell.

“I guess it comes down to a simple choice: get busy living or dying.” Let's all choose to live, just as Red and Andy Dufresne did.

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